You Will Know When You Are On The Right Life Path

The road to success is not a straight path. It is arguably more akin to a formula 1 circuit, with numerous directional changes that require expert handling to make it to the finish line without crashing. Sometimes, it is hard to know whether or not you are headed in the right direction. I believe that as long as the end goal is broad enough to leave room for flexibility, yet aligned with your talents, passions and higher purpose as well as being constant, then it is okay to have some zig zags along the way. Here are a few different ways to help you figure out if you are on the right path in life:

You Are Excited To Wake Up Every Morning
You wish you did not have to spend any time sleeping because you have so many great ideas running through your mind. You cannot wait to tackle the day and do something that you are genuinely passionate about. Every day is truly a new adventure, and the sheer volume of things you want to accomplish can feel almost overwhelming.

You Are Learning Something New Everyday
You never grow old if you are putting new information into your brain. Some people, on the other hand, are metaphorically six feet deep simply because they have unplugged their brains for the remainder of their life.  In order to be successful, you must go to bed a little wiser than you were in the morning.

You Are Exercising Regularly
Science is continually pointing to the connection between the health of one's body and one's emotional wellbeing. Becoming active and exercising not only makes you healthier physically, but can also help to increase the mental fortitude needed to become a successful person.

You Are Surrounding Yourself With Like Minded People
Your circle of friends include people who want more out of life, just like you do. You discuss ideas instead of gossiping about others. It is said that your success has a nearly direct correlation to the people you associate with. Your group is filled with intelligent and innovative people.

You Are Setting Goals AND Achieving Them
You are making a commitment to become a better individual. You are following through with your short term goals in order to eventually achieve your long term ones. Others can rely on you, and you can take great pride in knowing that you are living up to your own standards. You look in the mirror and you are proud of the person you see.

You Are Curious
You can grasp the fact that the world is ripe with opportunity. You want to know all of the different ways that you can improve yourself and put yourself into a position to catapult yourself to the next level. You have a thirst for knowledge that cannot be quenched. You want to know everything about everything.

Your friends, family and peers are noticing the changes you have made. When you are on the rise, people around you will take note of it. They may comment on the weight you have lost due to your new exercise regimen, or congratulate you on the new steps you are taking in your career. When you are dedicated to rising above the crowd, it is impossible to ignore. People will literally feel something when they are around you. They may not be able to put their finger on it, but they know you are going somewhere.

You Know What Is Important
You have figured out what matters and what does not. Things that are not directly tied into your plan for success are discarded. You have refined your life and your time is now being utilised in an efficient way. Basically, you have removed all of the unnecessary baggage from your life.

You Are Grateful
You know you have a long way to go, but you appreciate the things you are blessed with now. You realise that life has to be lived in the moment, regardless of how favourable the circumstances may be.

You Do Not Settle
Although you are grateful for what you have, you have not settled. You live life to the edge or completely outside of your comfort zone. You make goals that stretch your efforts and capabilities. Going for something big does not seem so much daunting as it does exciting and inevitable, because you have made up your mind that you are not going to live small anymore.

With thanks to Ayodeji Awosika  https://thoughtcatalog.com/ayodeji-awosika/2015/05/10-ways-you-know-youre-on-the-right-path-in-life/

Handle Anger In A Positive Way

Ticked off, peeved, irritated, bothered, annoyed, no matter how you say it, being angry is an emotion no one enjoys feeling. But while it is completely normal and human to experience, anger problems can come into play when we do not process our feelings in a healthy way. Anger can become a very real, chronic issue, if not handled properly and in a timely manner. You could find yourself blowing up at the smallest things, unable to control your emotions and doing or saying things in the heat of the moment that you later regret. Worst of all, anger can begin controlling your life without your awareness or permission.

Here are some healthy ways to process your anger the next time you start to lose your cool: 

Start Counting

It may sound silly, but counting to ten (or, if you are really angry, 100) is a great way to immediately relieve some built up tension. Why? Because it focuses your mind on the specific task of taking care of yourself first. Anger causes your blood pressure and heart rate to rise so counting to whatever number is appropriate for you will give your body a chance to cool off and slow down your breathing so you can get some time to think before saying or doing something you might regret.

Give Yourself A Time Out

No, you are not five years old anymore and yes, it may be a weird thing to try, but if it works for  kids, why would a “time out” not work for you too? You do not have to put yourself in a corner or send yourself up to your room, but taking brief breaks throughout the day may help you manage the stress. A bit of quiet time is often the best form of therapy when it comes to anger, because it gives you the chance to calm down and reflect on what exactly you are angry about and how the problem can best be solved.

Hit The Gym

Nothing de-stresses the body quite like exercise. When you find yourself angry about something you cannot control or change, it is great to take some control over your emotions and get those feel good endorphins pumping through your system with a trip to the gym. Go for a quick jog or a 30 minute walk, try a Pilates or Yoga class. Just get your body moving so your mind can start to relax, giving you full control over your anger instead of the other way around.

Address The Issue

Plenty of things can cause anger but those problems can also be solved, if you are willing to meet them head on. Rather than just blowing up and storming off when your teen misbehaves, your co-worker annoys you or your spouse does not agree with you on a certain issue, work on getting to the root of the problem. Discussing differences in a way that all parties involved feel respected is something every human being is capable of doing and being able to not only let someone you care about know how you feel, but do so in a healthy, mature way is the best course of action when you start to feel that anger rise. It is not the easiest option; it may be hard and it may even be very painful, but it will be worth it.

Find A Way To Let Go

A grudge is an awful thing to carry and it does nothing to help the bigger problems you might be facing. Consider where your anger truly comes from, get to the source and then learn to make peace with it. Learning to accept that you may never get the apology you want from someone and being able to forgive them anyway and move forward whole and healthy is one of the biggest lessons in life but, it is also one of the only ways to finally say goodbye to the angrier you. 

Get Help

We cannot do everything on our own. While some may find it embarrassing or a sign of weakness to ask for help, in fact, seeking advice and guidance with your anger issues is often the best course of action. Whether it is  a parent, friend, co-worker or a professional, share your anger issues with someone. Opening up and admitting that things may be getting out of control is often the first long term solution to your anger problem. 

With thanks to Jessica Toomer https://www.guideposts.org/better-living/positive-living/emotional-and-mental-health/6-ways-to-deal-with-anger

It may sound silly, but counting to ten (or, if you are really angry, 100) is a great way to immediately relieve some built up tension. Why? Because it focuses your mind on the specific task of taking care of yourself first. Anger causes your blood pressure and heart rate to rise so counting to whatever number is appropriate for you will give your body a chance to cool off and slow down your breathing so you can get some time to think before saying or doing something you might regret.

Give Yourself A Time Out 

No, you are not five years old anymore and yes, it may be a weird thing to try, but if it works for  kids, why would a “time out” work for you too? You do not have to put yourself in a corner or send yourself up to your room, but taking brief breaks throughout the day may help you manage the stress. A bit of quiet time is often the best form of therapy when it comes to anger because it gives you the chance to calm down and reflect on what exactly you are angry about and how the problem can best be solved.

Hit The Gym

Nothing de-stresses the body quite like exercise. When you find yourself angry about something you cannot control or change, it is great to take some control over your emotions and get those feel good endorphins pumping through your system with a trip to the gym. Go for a quick jog or a 30 minute walk, try a Pilates or Yoga class. Just get your body moving so your mind can start to relax, giving you full control over your anger instead of the other way around.

Address The Issue

Plenty of things can cause anger but those problems can also be solved, if you are willing to meet them head on. Rather than just blowing up and storming off when your teen misbehaves, your co-worker annoys you or your spouse does agree with you on a certain issue, work on getting to the root of the problem. Discussing differences in a way that all parties involved feel respected is something every human being is capable of doing and being able to not only let someone you care about know how you feel, but do so in a healthy, mature way is the best course of action when you start to feel that anger rise. It's not the easiest option; it may be hard and it may even be very painful, but it will be worth it.

Find A Way To Let Go

A grudge is an awful thing to carry and it does nothing to help the bigger problems you might be facing. Consider where your anger truly comes from, get to the source and then learn to make peace with it. Learning to accept that you may never get the apology you want from someone and being able to forgive them anyway and move forward whole and healthy is one of the biggest lessons in life but it’s also one of the only ways to finally say goodbye to the angrier you. 

Get Help

We can’t do everything on our own. While some may find it embarrassing or a sign of weakness to ask for help, in fact, seeking advice and guidance with your anger issues is often the best course of action. Whether it’s a parent, friend, co-worker or a professional, share your anger issues with someone. Opening up and admitting that things may be getting out of control is often the first long-term solution to your anger problem. 

Trust In Your Inner Wisdon

How often do you discount your inner wisdom? Do you allow the noise from the outside world to overshadow the guidance and truth living within you?

We are all influenced by life happening around us. It is natural to check in and see where we fit in with the rest of the world. The problem arises, when we forget we have an inner guide we can trust to steer us in a direction most aligned with who we are. The problem grows into a giant monster, when we turn our back on that wise voice and allow our ego to become the driving force of our lives. This is where true suffering is born.

There is no need to get ahead of ourselves and panic or fear our ego. We can always come back to the sacred place within us to get grounded and hear the gentle whisper of our truth. If we are out of practice, it may take a bit of time to figure out which voice is our ego and which one is our truth centre. But it will not take long, our truth is the voice that will feel right.

This voice is calming and non-judgmental. She will remind you all is well and to look around for the evidence to prove why this is so. She will drop gentle hints and nudges to go in a particular direction, or to reach out to a certain person. This voice is your intuition and she is powerful and humble. She is often overshadowed by the booming voice of the ego. But she understands the ego has a place and will add to the human journey you are on. She will never leave you, even if you lead long stretches of life from your ego. When you make your way back, she will dust you off and offer you the inner wisdom and guidance you had been tirelessly searching outside to find. She will always be there.

These practices will help you put all of the noise into perspective and find your way back home. If they resonate with where you are on your journey, give them a try and see how they fit.

Stop Justifying and You Will Quiet the Noise

We do not have to validate why we feel the way we do, or why we are on a particular path. In the grand scheme of life, the explanation is not necessary. Nobody is truly that focused on anyone else. Everyone is on their own journey trying to navigate the best they can. Others cannot make better decisions for us than our inner wisdom. Engaging in explanations to justify our inner wisdom only separates us from our truth. When we justify, we send the message that we do not really trust what we are being guided towards and that we need external validation to hear we are okay and on the right track. It is like saying to our truth centre: “I hear you, I trust you, but hang on a second I am going to just check in with my friends over there to see if they think you are right first.” Our inner spirit and truth is truth, it will not misguide us or hurt us.

Our inner spirit is pure, it is light and love and is within all of us who are walking a human journey. It is okay, we all have one, so it does not have to be explained. It is much more empowering and valuable to the world, when we honour our inner spirit and then express ourselves from this place. Stepping into our truth will quiet the noise and remove the need to justify our place in the world. When we trust ourselves to be ourselves, our suffering ends.

Be An Observer

Notice yourself, your words, your feelings and your reactions in your body. Are you holding your breath? What is the tone in the words you say aloud? Start to really listen to your thoughts and spoken words. See if you can tell if it is your ego shining through or your inner truth. When we practice listening, it becomes easier to detect which voice is truth and which one is not. This does not mean we can get rid of our ego, let that thought go. We can make friends with her, nurture her and give her productive jobs to do, like focusing on deep intentional breathing or taking in the sights and sounds around us.

What do you notice when you clear your mind of the need to talk, be noticed and be heard, is there space? Take in the people around you through this vast place, do you see love? You might even be surprised to see your own human self reflected in their eyes. When we become observers in our lives, we allow life to move through us. We become a conduit for love. We get to see the world through the eyes of love and through the heart of truth. The stories and hurts that once occupied the space in our hearts and minds, become welcoming spaces to hear our inner truth. This truth will lead us to our higher path and help us see the good in other people and the world around us.

Believe What You Know Is True

If your inner voice is pleading for you to make a move and you are still not budging, this is your opening to trust yourself more. It is so easy to turn your back on yourself and not trust yourself to know what is best. However, through continued practice, you will find the more you listen and trust yourself with the little things in life, the easier it will become to believe what you know is true in the bigger areas of your life.

If it helps, take baby steps to trust your wise voice, you do not have to jump in all at once. Warm up to the idea you are magnificent, powerful and wise. Know that all the guidance you could ever hope for lives within you.

Having faith in yourself is the most powerful gift we can give ourselves and the most empowering place we can lead our lives from. Believe what you know is true.

Trust in your inner wisdom.

With thanks to Emily Madill http://www.huffingtonpost.com/emily-madill/trust-in-your-inner-wisdo_b_12801896.html

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

The parent makes the rules and then routinely breaks them. The leader just asked everyone to scale back and then spends like there is no tomorrow. The politician says, “Trust me,” but we quickly learn that his promises are empty. The truth is, talk is cheap. Actions speak louder than words.

Why do people say one thing and then do another, make promises one second only to break them minutes later, say they care when it is so obvious they could not care less?

Can they not see the potential damage to their credibility? Why would they torpedo a relationship that has taken them a lifetime to build? Do they not realise they are undermining their chances for success? The next time they say something, people may doubt what they say or second-guess their intentions, simply because they are no longer trusted. No one is going to stand up and shout, “You just lost my trust and respect!” but the silence will be deafening

Some people may say it is not a big deal, everyone does it. No one is watching anyway, people do not really care. Well, I am here to tell you they are sadly mistaken!

You send a message with what you say AND what you do. If words are not supported with consistent actions, they will ring hollow. Someone once said, “Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.”

Here are some examples of people who live by the philosophy, “Do As I Say, Not As I Do.”

All Talk, No Action

The emperor is all talk, no action. Like the emperor’s new clothes, everything is centred on the show rather than substance. He talks a good game, but do not expect any action or follow up from this empty suit.

The politician will say anything to win your vote of confidence; this person is great with words but do not ask for accountability. Once this opportunist gets what she wants, she is nowhere to be found.

The hypocrites are so full of empty words that even they do not believe what they are saying. Forget action on their part. They have a hard enough time keeping their own stories straight.

The drifters have no backbone. They make statements one minute and change their positions the next. If it seems that these people are confused or evasive, it is because they are.

The professor speaks eloquently about theory, but that is where it ends. Action? That thought never crossed their mind. Friedrich Engels had it right when he said, “An ounce of action is worth a ton of theory.”

The zombie is so oblivious to reality he does not even realise that his words are out of step with his actions. It only takes someone else to shine a bright light on this fellow to expose his insincerity.

Actions Matter: Do As I Do, Not As I Say

Whether you are a leader motivating the “troops,” a role model influencing your “fans,” or a parent showing that you care, it is critical to send straightforward messages. If your words are not consistent with your actions, you are not only confusing the listener, you may also be causing irreparable damage to your own credibility.

Your reputation reflects the words AND actions that you send during the life of a relationship. In the early stages of a relationship, we extend ourselves in small ways and observe responses to our actions. Then we take appropriate action, engaging further or withdrawing a bit each time, until a level of trust is formed. Once we get to know someone, we look for regular and consistent patterns of behaviour because the more predictable people are, the more comfort we have with them.

We ask ourselves: “Do they feel strongly about their beliefs one day and abandon them the next?” “Do they expect others to live by one set of rules while they live by another?” “Do they make promises only to break them?”

When you “walk the talk,” your behaviour becomes a catalyst for people’s trust and faith in you. And it also emphasises what you stand for.

The bottom line is simply this: Trust is not guaranteed, and it cannot be won overnight. Trust must be carefully developed, vigorously nurtured, and constantly reinforced. And, although trust may take a long time to develop, it can be lost through a single action, once lost, it can be very difficult to re-establish.

So, any time you make a claim, no matter how small, and display inconsistent behaviour, you shatter the comfort zone, and weaken your bond of trust with others. As a result, anything thought to be predictable in the future may be treated as suspect. The fact is, everything you do in life sends a message. So, make sure to practice what you preach. As Ben Franklin said, “Well done is better than well said.”

With thanks to Frank Sonnenberg http://www.franksonnenbergonline.com/blog/actions-speak-louder-than-words/

Seize Every Opportunity

Opportunity. We all love that word. It is a word that inspires hope, as well as something we can wish upon to make our lives better. It is a single event that will smash into us, enlighten us, and take us away on its fluffy feathered wings, where we will live happily ever after. Unfortunately, that is not the case for most of us.

What Are Opportunities? 

Real opportunities are like the sale's person who knocks on our door, or call us whilst we are eating dinner at night. We do not want to open the door because we are irritated, we think we know how it is going to pan out, or we are too scared to say ‘no’ when they ask us a question.

Real opportunities are the ones that we do not immediately see. They come by at the most unexpected, mostly inopportune, times. We are so obsessed with other distractions or our own opinions that we normally miss the majority of opportunity that falls across our path.

When we do see opportunities, we treat them the same way as we treat the inappropriate sales person, with disdain and a bad attitude. Our attitude when opportunity presents itself determines whether that opportunity will make our lives better.

“Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” – Thomas Edison

 How many times have you been offered a new job, invited to go out on a date, or even to go skydiving? How many times have you said no? Probably more times than you have said yes.

Spark An Idea

All of these occurrences are opportunities. The opportunity to experience something new, something different, something more.  You would never ask someone else out on a date, or go skydiving by yourself, ok, maybe you would, but it would not be as unexpected, or awesome.

Would you not like to experience more, earn more money, or simply be happier? We all want that, but are not necessarily ready to take the risks by ourselves. Sometimes we have not even thought about doing something until someone or something prompts us.

That prompt initiates the spark of an idea in our heads where it eventually barrels through into our forethought like an avalanche. Sometimes it can take months to gather the courage to go for it, sometimes it is only a matter of seconds.

Take A Chance

We need to become "yes" people (well almost). Say yes when you perceive these prompts. Say yes to new life. Say yes to experience. Do not say yes to everything, though, saying yes to every opportunity will burn you out completely. Trust your gut, it will take you down the path that is right for you.

Taking opportunities can be scary, some of them definitely are. To achieve anything in life, we need to take a chance. The beauty of taking chances, is that anything can happen. You might fall, get hurt, or be embarrassed, but what if you could experience something that is completely mind blowing and changes your life forever.

Stop And Think

The next time someone makes a job offer, invites you to a social event or offers you a free ticket to visit a new country stop and think. Your usual answer is ‘no’, but what if this time you say ’yes’. This time, go forth with the intention to learn, to experience, to enjoy.

“I’d rather have a life of ‘oh wells’ than ‘what ifs’.” – Unknown

Know vs Wonder 

When I think back over the chances I have taken when opportunity presented itself, I am content in the knowledge that I know what it feels like to live in different countries; I know what it means to say "yes" when I was asked for my hand in marriage; and I know how to handle high pressure situations at the office.

I am happy I took those opportunities rather than forever wondering what it would be like to live in another country, or  wonder if I have what it takes to handle pressure.

By taking opportunities you can change your wondering to knowing. You can feel at ease knowing that you at least tried, knowing that you at least took the chance of the opportunity, not knowing what the outcome may be.

“Not trying is the only true failure.” – Unknown

Is there an opportunity knocking at your door? Go answer it with the intention of saying ‘yes’ or if opportunity does not knock build a door. Never let an opportunity slip through your fingers.

With thanks to Terence Brown https://motivationgrid.com/take-advantage-opportunities-life/#